Sunday, July 03, 2005
ok so here i am on a saturday evening slacking away. while trying not to think about the growing pile of work on my desk. because every time i do. it just spoils my mood. like right now. damnit.
first of all, i found that petrina's latest entry, which was like today, actually holds a lot of meaning for everyone. this is what school has become for us. it's like a mechanical system. day in, day out, it's the same routine, repeated week after week, no matter how much they try to change it so that it's not so monotonous
throw in a ton of work every week. and you get a cycle of work that keeps repeating itself every seven days. and it will never stop. until the exams. which is worse. or better, by your own view.
she's right. there's practically zero time to just sit down and take a break nowadays. especially when you have work to do, your mind will just stray to that work, no matter how hard you try to break away from its grasp. and in the end, you'll still end up doing it. that's the mindset that has been indoctrinated into us all. it's repeated so many times that we believe it now. 'you shouldn't procrastinate work. why do it later when you can do it now'. so because of that, we now end up losing all our time of enjoyment
this can't be the way. there has to be a way out of this.
this blog is dead
jack of all trades. master of none. that is what i have become. i can do anything. but it always goes irreparably wrong. every time. so what am i now. i am nothing. i have nothing left. and there is nothing that can be done. no one can help me. not anymore. it's too late.
looked up at 11:17 AM
(go figure my age)
4.16 Enoch in '05
5.4 Numbers (Staplets?) in '06
Break dancer in training
Plays the Cello
Wants to learn Violin
Wants to learn Flute/Clarinet